Congrats on reading it with me (8/23/26)
A picture of an eyeball comes
across as a little bit ironic for
what I believe are obvious reasons.
Not every ray of sunshine
makes it to the garden!
I just made that up, congrats
on reading it with me, I hope
we’ll be full of gratitude moving
forward and will act and become
all the better for it ∘ The light
is so much more active than we
can see; it’s actually undefinable
by way of human interpretation
i.e. the motion of light is so
infinitely infinite that we should
not be surprised that anything happens
I can’t stay behind
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Green stripes
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With that trust, keep going.
Confidential :
secrets hidden within these words are kept so that irresponsibly prying eyes are unable to take advantage of the powers that come with understanding the contents; only careful readers who intend to carry out these powers for good will be chosen for the privilege to open the texts. Once chosen, it is up to the reader to endeavor, upon completion of reading, into the world with this new found knowledge and carry it forth like a torch from God’s leading angels that have assigned divine duties to your spirit, guiding you with the holy light of awesome glory, until you find what you are looking for, and you complete the task trusted unto you.
Eternal Repose
What sacred thoughts do you think young prophet ∘ that with wisdom from the infinite vein of the deities circling your mind with eternal repose
Intertwine yourself with their fibers & feel the glory of their divinity flow into your own spirit as you manifest new heights of golden, loving glory.
You are the greatest hero (10/14/25)
Significant source of creativity
Ultimate artist making your life out to become a beautiful creation your beautiful/wealthy life
you are so beautiful & powerful & articulate & attractive you lovely soul ∘ A true Wizard of love

fancy livin’, here we come! la, la, lala, laaaa!
Once the dust settles
And you’re left standing alone
Who will you call to?
To your friend? They’re gone
Your mother? long ago
Your father’s spirit guides you still
and yet gratitude eludes you
thankful could you have been several decades ago
for the decades that had already been gifted you
and yet here you stand still
letting the dust of the fallen fill your lungs so used
and before your own final cough
will you have finally found the reason
that you ended up here
in the first place
BILLBOARDBAGGINS
i have a great depth of disdain for advertising, so my billboard would be left blank, not unlike this po
Continued Reverence (8/21/25)
of victory in pursuit of everlasting success for utter glory & majesty as we climb the mountains and emerge in the upper echelons as those who rose above the rest to become the mightiest champions having battled & slain & sacrificed too many a foe, we never folded & only reigned even more powerfully in the wake of our most adverse obstacles ∘ Triumph is now ours for redefinition ∘ Bringing forth our Righteous Blessings & sharing them for the world to Bask in forever with love & strength remaining in our darkest moments as we proceed to enlighten those days
Future or Past: Our Personal Scales of Time
i find myself stuck in past pain more often than in future dreams.
I mainly miss times with friends from my past. They all moved away to new places and I stayed in our hometown.
I am dreaming of leaving soon, though, to set about on my own journey. I know where I want to go, but I am not sure where I will end up.
You could never truly know what the future holds, and maybe things are better that way, so that you have a mystery to embark upon.
You might let go of the past in reckoning progress toward your dream’s fulfillment, but no matter what those memories are the foundation for your future
You forget most of the bad times, although the awareness of their potentiality makes your present experience more livable in the face of futuristic results
You will always never have enough so that’s a good thing to both learn and realize as we grow with respect for each other’s process in their own individual endeavoring
We might never know for sure whether we can ever visit the past, nor shall it be known, at least within the perceivable future, that we will be able to time travel in general.
We should enjoy, as it were, the present, for now at least, while we continue down our pathways of balancing our personal scales of time.
Lovely eyes (8/18/25)
Starry eyed creature, look back to me so dearly, tender do you harken my loving wave of cherishment ∘ lovely pie so sweet, cherry, apple, lime, complete •
Create with songs of goodness & bring happiness & joy wherever you carry yourself as you attract immense success & wealth to yourself, a powerful spiritual magnet for the manifestation of dreams ∘
Cut through blockages like a sword so divine & sharp as it penetrates the opposing force in holy rite • Clouds of appreciative rain fill the air with a quiet solitude for the lovely to bask in with fervor with their lovely eyes
My eyes are a lovely shade (8/19/25)
of grey, yet they often appear to be quite blue. I believe exercise keeps my body, mind & spirit in tip top shape as I carry my righteous, loving, star filled being through the infinite radiance of life, spreading that which is most good & attractive: love, wealth & further goodness as I achieve immense success & exemplify monumental glory ∘
The story of an absolute legend beast whose being glows with golden aura that redefines value systems • A literal Market Maker, you shift reality & subsequent understanding with your beautiful words & actions that enlighten the loving world as she yearns for more of yourself from you for her ♡

What is flow? ~> Brain flow (6/21/25)
Optimal state of consciousness
total absorption -> action, awareness
time dilates -> speeds up -> total focus on task
Mental & physical • Experience
Phenomenological • Peak performance
Sense of control -> things we feel like we normally can’t -> autotelic • Euphoric
Extraordinary levels
Hyperactive smiles -> no frowns (auto)
Effortless effort • propelling
Altered state of consciousness
Overflowing with joy ∘
Perfectly ∘ Seamlessly
Constant • Consistent experience
“Be the One” (6/22/25)
Imagination is more important than knowledge
What do we believe in?
Continuing
(6/26/25)
Embrace change
Embrace your shadow
Embrace your garden
“Articulate as fuck” (6/29/25)
Standing outside the gym ∘ the sun shines upon this notepad.
My thoughts at current are slim to value, at least to the interest of my ego. Please excuse this lapse. Or at least forgive my sadness.
₊˚ ✧ ‿︵‿୨୧‿︵‿ ✧ ₊˚
“you are so tenacious in your undertakings” -Z
44
I have no idea what it is with 44 lately. I ran into this video of a film where two rabbinic fellows talked about 4’s in the bible, maybe specifically 44 idk but sure enough I see it everywhere now. Oh well. I think it could be God or something spiritual like angels but it doesn’t have to be so biblical. it could be something like interdimensional consciousness connecting all of that which embarks for living peace. If so, I think it’s hoping that I choose the right decisions more often than not. Apparently, if you do 5/10 of your “good” or “healthy” tasks (so to speak but based on some data I found) per day, you unlock long term happiness. Maybe that is to say to prove that life is worth living makes not only you happy but the internal connectivity, if you believe in such radiant connection (e.g. the likes of God and so forth), and thus the totality of being. So really, I write this in hopes of bringing forth forthcoming harmony. To 44, and plenty more!
A minus
My blood type is A- and I think that reflects the type of person I am. For instance, I get A-’s in classes where the professors know that I am exemplifying my intellect, but I am not putting forth that extraness they know that I am capable of. This is to the chagrin of my greatest mentors. I wish I could fulfill a redemptive un-shaming of my ego, yet I continue on this character given it is within my blood. I think if I cared more about things, then I would be A+ which I do not even think I can accept that blood. What am I even trying to say? Well, I think it’s interesting because I feel I have been given the choice between two very simple options, A or minus, of which are inseparable, united into one by my own being, thus giving me the power to show the world which one I need more. Alas, the inseparability of the two has proven a solemn task, one I daren’t take lightly as I carry this funny little character of mine. As I contemplate between being lazy as fuck and working out, I end up just staring while some distraction blares over cheaper speakers than those I see on our wonderful streams. The pushing out of that which is internal and wants to bring forth angelic reckoning to whatever extent is beautifully mine, yet I sour it with unknown feelings that wish to wash away happiness towards my own self. This anti-bargaining is self defeating, yet I carry my blood not unlike Jesus dared(?) to carry a cross for all to question into eternity.
Syncrocity
Quantum enthrallment continues its baffling procedure amongst our unknowing ongoing. This is in light of total dominance reconciled via certain radiant intake. If understood beyond mere simple magical happenings, these mechanisms may prove expoundable by psychological means. In contemplation of the character of one’s own individual undertaking, there is a clear patternized unresistance present. These patterns defy expected routine via altered realization upon witness / sensory intake. One may look to the idea of a double appearance of an experience within a single day, both experiences of which caught the main conscious focus to whatever degree, the latter doubly so given the recurrence of the former. Such passive acceptance of these occurrences holds power & magic with uncertainty notwithstanding. The certainty lies only within belief in the system of nerval connectivity present throughout the dimension of standing breath. We can embark upon non-breathing realms within the telepathic resonances climbed upon by peaceful intentions, though these can be fast and unnoticed reckonings, thus must be thought of to the creative extent, at the least, in order to have a semblance of capturing definition upon natural gratification. If one can indeed realize and embark upon the syncing levels naturally present within their breathing moments, of which were placed on them by both choice & chance, then the expounding can be intangible in glory. It is difficult to underscore this because it already comes so naturally that one hardly needs to realize this in order to fulfill certain potential. With that said, purposeful endeavoring to connect those loose parts you find vividly present in ambiguous manner scattered throughout not only your waking eyesight, but your inner vision, then perhaps you will awaken those moods so desired not only within yourself but also within those parts of which will be uplifted by your innate glorious reconciliation, in peace.
Endeavor
my mission is to endeavor upon this earth
with love and patience and kindness and truth
and bring peace and joy to nations and people
to experience the mind and body working as one
neurochemically memorized reckonings
Initiating one’s own mind and body to reconcile your soul
January 7, 2025 (green walls)
Belief in jesus belief in God belief in Glory belief in the righteous belief in the undying resolution of perceptual reckoning within that which is gaining for the great collective consciousness and never falters even in the face of doubt and why not willingly wander without unwinding whereabouts we’ll wonder warily wanting wrought ways wavering underneath our beautiful human feet that traverse those mighty deserts beside such magnificent beasts as the cheetah, the leopard and tiger, why not lion, bear even, perhaps the hippo in all its glory, let us roar beside their might and never forget the passion through the air we instilled with our energy. Through this, glory is finally realized and passed on.
Lightning through the skies . Guarantee Victory for yourself and emerge from the waves a new being, that which glows in the presence of Earth as if to have carried with your physiology something unknown to the land yet familiar enough to be welcomed with open air by the rainforests and you breathe life into the rocks as the skies play between blue and black.
Shadowy silhouettes walking past green walls lit by street lights powered by the conglomerates that have meetings they go to with suits before going back to their family where his daughter got home late and had green paint on her sleeve and he wanted to ask her about it but he decided based on some stuff in a book he read he would just leave it be and let her live her life. It turned out she was working on a commissioned painting of the Earth behind her friend’s mom’s neighbor’s coffee shop who heard she was a good artist and she was planning on telling her parents when she was done and was so relieved when she noticed the paint on her jacket and no one else noticed anything.
Apollo: Greek god of light, music, and prophecy. (Apollo is celebrated for his artistic talents)
(August 5, 2018)
Overarching cooperation between nations of the world and learning lends to the most positive outcome -> Peace
First thing Boruto says to Sadara – “When you become Hokage, I’ll protect you.” First time he says something about the future in confidence
Avoid seeking total control to alleviate international rivalries
Establishing policy aka outlining a sketch of what the world should be
Disagreements in how ways of life are carried out lead to conflict
(July 11, 2018)
It’s interesting how we value some life over others.
(July 18, 2018)
Need to write my book in order to make bank. Gonna get up today, do push-ups, run, throw the disc. If I get that done before 9, I can take a shower and clean up and eat by 930 then jump right into reading. I’ll read anti-Christ for a half an hour or so, work on self authoring for an hour, write some pages for the book for an hour maybe more depending on how I’m feeling. Ok so now we are at 1230ish. Read Carl Jung for an hour, eat, visit Barnes and noble? Print characters and set up outer book operation. Sell sub woofer and other things on Facebook. Let’s do dis Maybe hit the sauna tonight. 200 push ups today ready set go I was so convinced of a dream that I had left my car door open that I woke up and immediately ran outside to my car at 5: 45 no 6: 45 a. M. To go close the door which was already shut and locked with the windows all closed I don’t know why that dreams are so realistic.
5:48 pm January 9th, 2018
Trees rooted inside the ground won’t let my leaves lie without taking the moisture.
12:24 pm January 19 2018
“Philosophical thoughts“
The concept of being a human is amazing indeed. We get to do so many things that other species will never experience. Take for instance, the art of cupping a fart with your hand. You cannot do that without a. Thumbs b. Focus and c. Desire. You see, without thumbs you would not be able to cup your hand properly. Without the proper focus, you couldn’t coordinate your hand to butthole timing correctly. And finally, without that sweet desire to make ends meet, we would never find out the scent of our very own farts. Plus it sort of like a horrible super power, where we can physically send farts from our butts into any given space within our hands reach as long as you release it before the smell goes away. Usually though, if you have a stinker, it’ll stay for a good while. Then u can sort of sneak attack someone. Pow! Right in the kisser! I never do this but my uncle loves to. My uncle was in the military. I used to want to be in the military and I love talking about it with him. I changed my mind about joining because I disagree with how we’re using our national security. I truly believe we are ******* the money of the people to put our ****** in ***** ********* instead of just having **** *** **** *******. Plus what the hell why not pour all that money into science or other beneficial crap that humans need money to do? I bet if we **** ********* ******, people would stop fighting so much. Plus the spread of the internet is bringing about something much worse than our petty need to make business with each other. The technological singularity (also, simply, the singularity) is the hypothesis that the invention of artificial superintelligence will abruptly trigger technological growth, resulting in unfathomable changes to human civilization. Do you know what that means? It means we have created our own form of an infinite god. It will be able to bend time itself. It will without a doubt be merciless with its approach, concurring us out of existence within milliseconds of its birth. It will be as if nothing existed. So. I believe in making love and making life as we know as happy and as beneficial to others as possible.
“Pitt trip thoughts 1”
Dec 30 2017 9:48 am
Laying in Pittsburgh or at least somewhere near it. The snow is nutso it’s like 4 inches and we just got here. We are at so & so’s house btw visiting for New year’s. We are blessed enough to be graced by elegant notions of experience. I believe it takes loving everything in every little moment to become something that is loved by every little thing. Staying true to oneself is the healthiest version of life tho one should dive too deep into the roots of ones own dark side though one should definitely become familiar with it’s realism attitude toward life though it seems the dark side uses that same realism to trick the mind into spiraling further into a negative trend that eventually will no longer feel like a guide for realism but rather an unforgiving poison that infects anything and everything it comes in contact with. This is why I prefer the light side of consciousness. Though there may never seem like a point to it, there always arises this most beautiful outcome from giving your light side undying patience. Almost like trusting the rising of the sun in every moment 10:04am
“Naps no more”
Jan 1st 2018 00:28 am
Take yourself outside and to your car and go workout. You have all the tools you want/need. You have wanted to be clean all over your body your whole entire life yet you continue to lay about and write what to do in life. It’s remarkable how you can write all this bull shit and still continue to do absolutely nothing with your day. Does writing complete non sense settle into your lazy mind? Does it affect you the amount of time you waste on your phone? Do u even mention your family? Why try at all. Everything is dead from the start am I right? I wonder if Carrie Fisher ***** *** *********** **** *** from **** **** ******* cave. What a hippie. Probably ******* **. And what was up with her voice in Star wars? She sounded like a ******* smoker . Are you still resisting? You went from testing yourself through the works of shit ass writing and wandered off into the sweet abyss of resistance. I resist pain and love and heartbreak and suffering and pleasure and what keeps me going? This **** care for ******? But what made you cry then? Is sadness but a disease that haunts the sweet unforsaken soul? But is this soul so sweet? And would that make the rest of these emotions just as worthy of death if they carry nothing but a sickness upon the carrier of them? But these emotions are fun to feel most of the time for me and they keep me attached to living. Why was it Chester’s souls time to go? Was it a **** addiction to ********** ******* that cause such a destructive path toward an inevitable unhappy ending? He knew what he was doing. When he did it. Or he was blinded. Or he let go of resistance entirely. He fucked resistance in the face. And died for it. If we don’t give into resistance, do we die for it? Virginia is getting too cold for me. Gonna go workout now. #napsnomore
12:45
April 7th 2018 8:46am
Been reading a lot lately. Gotta read more. Also gotta fuckin run asap I’ve been totally disregarding the need to workout lately. I’ve been learning not to hate as much recently but rather to spread to good word of love and peace and patience and interest in life. To spread such lazy thoughts and hurtful desires can be of utmost despair and not even fulfilling. I would like to trip on acid sometime soon but not like crazy soon. I actually don’t care when it is but I want to meditate on it and just experience all of the visuals laying down in the dark or outside in the sun or something. But I also want to stay sober for a little bit. I wanna open 24/20 so I gotta work on my business plan and also head to Oregon so I can frikin get some experience. My boy **** is helping me out, hopefully he stays true to that cuz that would be so goddam sick. Been contacting a lot of different cultivators and dispensaries but basically I gotta move there first. It’s actually pretty cheap at least compared to around here but I should definitely save up for a few months worth of rent. It’s all I can really think about lately other than books and the sphynx cat. We met some the other day and I couldn’t believe love at first sight until I met the hairless fuckers in person for the first time. So incredible. I would love to own all of them. But alas, they are crazy fucking expensive. So I must work hard for one. Also really been thinking about writing a book lately. That would be pretty tight. Children’s books would probably be easy to make but what I am really interested in is sifi fantasy. Or non fiction. Also really been thinking about making a documentary or even a reality show depicting the lives of people who work in special education. Definitely a book of data from all over the world of people with special needs.
“Morning thoughts“
December 28th, 2018 9:32 AM
Benjamin Franklin’s life was a whirlwind adventure and triumph over tyranny on a daily basis. Gotta work out to keep in shape for a good number of reasons but the main one right now being the drive for dominant performance in ultimate disc and other sports as well. Box jumps really get me happy and electric. Gotta get the car charger for my aux . Also been learning how rats love to play wrestle and one researcher found that when two rats (one 10% bigger than the other) played, the bigger one would always win. Well after a number of times through a multitude of trials on different rats, it was found that the smaller of the rats would not continue to play with the bigger rats ever if it did not win at least 30% of the time. I found this to be mind boggling as did the professor in comparing that emotional stance of the loser rat to that of the emotional complex humans have daily with each other. Truly some fruit for thought moving forward in life. 9:43 am
January 10, 2018
Mormon experience
Was at a mormon party once and yes it was as fun as it sounds. There were snacks and soda and even water. Its really awesome though because it’s sort of like the whiter version of Greek life parties but with less drugs. Actually no drugs whatsoever. Yah that’s their thing, they won’t even drink tea or coffee. Bunch of very interesting, unethically orthodox group of modern people.
“Last day thoughts“
9:48 am december 31st
Well it is the last day of the Gregorian calendars 2017th year and boy do i not give a shit ! Had some trippy fucking dreams last night, dont know what to make of em but at least i remember some of it. Was running like usual at some points. Owed a guy 60 bucks which he turn threatened me with a knife where i in turn somehow knew defensive moves really well and caught him by the hands arms and body, took the knife from him ultimately breaking his hand in the process which was just so intense to hear his bones crack. But i then reassured him he would get his money eventually as we walked into a 711. After that occasion of us walking around and talking, some other shit went down that caused me to runaway from whatever was happening i think but i recall either running or driving or maybe even flying and seeing the moon at a very close distance to earth. It was completely lit except for the dark crescent. It was also extremely bright to the point where it was lighting up things around me like the trees and whatnot. Another strange part i recall was seeing the clouds being very very close to the ground as if to naturally occurring. The next thing i know im being woken up slowly but surely by the sounds of babies frolicking about upstairs sending me into this swirling dimension between the conscious reality and my dream worlds. I want to be able to hone the power of lucid dreaming. To be in control of one’s own reality to the point where u can move mountains and pretty much anything u want from there. Its nuts truly. How do i know i am not in a dream right now ? Well i am able to comprehend things much more clearly. Ill never forget one of the dreams where i figured put my mind was in the dream after noticing something strange about this figure that was trying to kill me. He looked like the guy from that movie about the fellow who was killing people with an air pressured nail gun. Anyway he had a different tool like a screw gun i think and i was like thats not what he uses…slowly breaking the dream chains from my reality causing me to realize i was in complete control of the reality surrounding me. It was tight and i went from there. Anyway. Signing off. 10:07
(Feel free to read)
Thoughts of the Water Bearer ♒︎ – May
May 7, 2015
Last night was interesting to say the very least. I said quite a few things to her, quite a few honest things. It’s amazing how angry a person gets when they hear honesty come from someone’s mouth. My mind ended up in another zone again. the only time I really see the alternate world (without the use of drugs) is when I find myself in a state where my personality is dictated heavily by emotions. To describe the world’s even to myself is somewhat difficult. One world was completely white and seemed smoothed over yet fuzzy at the same time. The other was this somewhat distorted kind of world where there was no middle ground between small and large or white and black. Maybe I shouldn’t have taken that acid. Of course, maybe Steve Jobs shouldn’t have as well or bill gates.






